HEARD ABOUT TOWN By Vic Parker

Like a bad penny, the I-69 concept just keeps coming back. Saw where Hugh Taylor, Harrison County judge, briefed the Marion County Commissioners Court on the concept which dreamers and those with a financial interest see as a be-all, end-all effort that will make Interstate travel oh so much better while lining the pockets of investors in some foreign country … Spain, I think. And maybe a certain former governor with really neat hair. Passing along all the latest news, Taylor noted that a U.S. 59 Business route will still “bring traffic into town.” Here’s a headline: There already is a Business 59 that brings traffic into town. Has been for years, so that sop isn’t worth much. The good news here is that a lot of us will be dead and gone before it becomes a reality … if it ever does.

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NASA just ruined our lives, you know. For the first time in 3,000 years, the astrological signs will be updated. This means that the majority of us are about to experience a total identity crisis. Apparently, these changes are due to the fact that the constellations are not in the same position in the sky that they once were, and the star signs are about a month off now, as a result. To further confuse things, there is now a new, 13th sign, called Ophiuchus, which those born between Nov. 29 and Dec. 17 are lucky enough to have to learn to pronounce. Here is NASA’s definitely-not-confusing explanation for this: “The constellations are different sizes and shapes, so the sun spends different lengths of time lined up with each one,” they say. “The line from Earth through the sun points to Virgo for 45 days, but it points to Scorpius for only seven days. To make a tidy match with their 12-month calendar, the Babylonians ignored the fact that the Sun actually moves through 13 constellations, not 12. Then they assigned each of those 12 constellations equal amounts of time. Besides the 12 familiar constellations of the zodiac, the sun is also aligned with Ophiuchus for about 18 days each year.” I’m kinda’ disappointed because I’ve now become a Taurus, where once I was a Gemini. I liked being a Gemini, and changing it is a bunch of bull … if you’ll allow me that. If you were born between Nov. 29 and Dec. 17, good luck telling folks you’re now an Ophiuchus.

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The following is illustrative of what apparently is an IQ in free fall in this country … Some people just can’t wait to talk politics, prompting a Kansas police department to ask people to stop misusing the 911 system. The tweet from their official account reads: “We realize politics can make emotions run high, but…

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